W.T.F.




Whatever you want to say, the artist formally known as Maurice Clarett is a tool. In fact, he is a hatchet. Maurice, or "Mo", was pulled over last morning (4 in the AM) because of an illegal U-Turn. Big Mo tried his hardest to outrun the cops, but, much like his combine, Mo failed to impress. After the cops stopped him by placing spikes down, they realized that this was no ordinary chase. Apparently, Mr. Badassmotherfuck had a bottle of vodka, 3 handguns, a loaded AK-47, and a HATCHET in his front seat. Ohhh, It gets MUCH better. The cops tried to subdue Mo by tazering him (always a good time). Unfortunately, their device was ineffective against the power that is Mo. You see, Mo had a BULLET PROOF VEST on. Let's recap: 3 handguns, a loaded AK-47, a bullet proof vest, a bottle of vodka, ANDDDDDD (drum-roll)....a hatchet. So here is my question: What the fuck was the hatchet for? Was he gonna go scalp an Indian? Either Mo was going to Iraq to fight the Taliban OR he was looking for the woman who was going to testify against him (he was supposedly a few blocks away from her house). Inside information has told me Mo was a big time drug dealer in Warren. Perhaps he was going Tony Montana on someone...who knows. Either way, a fun game has now been invented: over/under 15 years for Mo.